New Year, Better Me.

Until recently, I used the phrase “New year, new me.” New Year’s is a time for reinvention, for starting fresh and beginning again. But looking at 2017 in the last moments of 2016, I don’t agree with the phrase.

I don’t want a NEW me. I like me. Or, I’m beginning to, anyway. I don’t want to create a totally different me. I want to grow. I want to improve. Maybe instead of saying “New year, new me,” we should switch to “New year, better me.” I think I’ll start right now.

I have compiled a list of goals (I won’t say “resolutions,” because I feel like it’s been overdone and I almost never stick to resolutions.) So here, for your reading pleasure, are my 17 Goals for 2017.

1. Read 20 books.


Ever since I learned to read, it was very rare for me to be seen without a book in hand. Whereas I still possess a thirst and passion for reading, I read far less than I used to. I have tried to come up with half-baked excuses as to why I don’t read as much anymore, but the truth is that I just haven’t carved the time out to do it. I have gotten into a routine of spending about an hour before I go to sleep browsing the internet on my phone. This is a habit I will be breaking in the new year.

2. Go on more dates.

Of course I mean with my husband…but I also mean with my friends. It all boils down to not taking enough time to nurture my relationships properly. With a packed schedule, it becomes easy to neglect something as simple as calling up a friend and asking them to dinner, or scheduling a night or two each month to stay in and play board games with the hubs. And you know what? This goes for myself, too. I need to take myself out on dates more.

3. Keep on bloggin’.

Now that I have revived My Crunchy Crusade, I have opened the doorway to blogging again. I have set a goal of blogging at least once a week. I even have a shortlist of topics to write about for the next few months. Hooray for writing therapy! I hope you guys will stay tuned!

4. Meditate.

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I know that meditation means many things to many people. A lot of people picture meditating as something a guru does, seated with their legs “criss-cross applesauce” (I’m bringing back that phrase, so help me), eyes closed and touching their index fingers to their thumbs, forming a circle. Whereas this is one way of doing it, it’s not the only way to look inward and achieve moments of peace. This year, I plan to seek these moments of peace throughout my day, living in the moment, taking in what I’m experiencing, and being truly present. I can’t tell you how many times I have gone home and been asked, “How was your day?” only to blink confusedly for a few seconds, trying to recall. I know I went to work and did my job, but how was my day? I hope to remedy this in 2017.

5. Make more art.

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This goes across the board. The arts mean a great deal to me, whether it be visual, performing, literary, you name it. There are a number of projects I already have lined up for the year: working on my blog/writing poetry, directing The Great Gatsby and hopefully being involved in a few other productions throughout the year, and working on chronicling the last few years with scrapbooking, to name a few. I plan on relishing any other involvement with the arts that comes my way. I have a creative soul, and I need to work on nourishing it more.

6. Drink more water.

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This one’s really straightforward. I am entirely convinced that I have spent the majority of my life mildly dehydrated, so I need to be more mindful of sipping water throughout the day. I could expound on the health benefits of water, or perhaps even the symbolism of water as one of the bases of life, but I’ll leave it at this: I need to carry a water bottle with me everywhere. Or chain it to my ankle; whatever it takes.

7. Whine less, celebrate more.

THIS. This is a biggie. I am susceptible to negativity. My anxiety seems to feed and thrive off of it. For my entire life, my factory setting has been more negative than positive. But as the entirety of my high school and a portion of my college life taught me, no one likes a complainer. No one. As a result, I have spent these past few years trying to negate the negativity. Though there are plenty of times where complaining is just a part of life and a healthy way to vent frustration, every day is a battle to remain positive and stop the whining. I plan on continuing this fight and trying to encourage others to do the same, because I would be a total hypocrite if I told people to stop whining without following my own advice. Thus, I created My Crunchy Crusade and also the Glass Half Full Initiative (#glasshalffullinitiative) to spread positivity and forward-thinking in life and on social media. What do you have to be happy about? Celebrate it! I know I will be in 2017!

8. Say “no.”

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For those of you who know me, you know that I care a LOT about what people think of me. Like, a LOT. Though I’m beginning to be better about it, I make myself sick over disappointing people. What I’m learning, however, is that it is completely okay to say no to people. NO, I would not like to join your LulaRoe Facebook group. NO, I cannot join your committee/board. NO, I will not be able to run that errand for you. NO. It’s another daily struggle, but one I continually work on.

9. Stop apologizing.

In the same vein as saying NO, I have this very annoying tendency to apologize for almost everything I do. I don’t know if it’s a societal thing, where I’m afraid of ruffling feathers as a woman, or if it’s my own neurosis, but I apologize way too much. Sure, there are instances that warrant an apology. Running over someone’s foot with a shopping cart because you weren’t paying attention? Thoughtlessly insulting someone during an argument? Missing an appointment because you didn’t write it down? Yes, by all means, apologize with meaning and with your heart. Having a differing opinion and respectfully making a counterpoint? Not doing something for someone because it makes you uncomfortable? Standing up for yourself? No. No more.

10. Get outside.

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Again, this is another instance where I’ve made half-baked excuses. I do not take enough time to be outside enjoying nature. There is more to life than sitting at a computer all day and then coming home to sit in front of a tv and go to bed. Here’s to embracing Mother Nature!

11. Stop comparing apples to oranges.

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I believe we all have a tendency to look at other peoples’ lives and say, “What am I doing wrong?” I know I do, almost constantly. The thing is…no one knows what anyone else has gone through to get where they are. We all have so many factors contributing to how our lives turn out. Some people truly do live a charmed life, with very few things that ever go wrong for them. Some people appear to live that charmed life, but suffer on the inside, or hide the bad things very well. The fact of the matter is…none of us are the same, so we do ourselves and others a disservice by comparing one person to another. I catch myself looking at other women and making things a competition. She does this, she does that, she looks a certain way, she acts a certain way…why can’t I be/look/act more like her? That’s the wrong approach. Instead of comparing myself to these other women…why not try to be happy with who I am?

12. LET IT GO.

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2017 is the Year of Elsa. Or…the year of Let It Go. Here’s one of my favorite memes about my struggle:

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One of the main contributors (and there are many) of my day-to-day stress is that I hold onto the wrong things. Instead of hanging on to the simple delights of my day and the good things that happen along the way (I unintentionally rhymed, but I’m going to keep it), I tend to harp on the bad things. There are things that happen in life that suck. It is impossible to scrape by without being touched by some unfortunate occurrences. The biggies should be dealt with and may take time to heal from, but the smaller bumps in the road need to be LET GO. Sometimes nothing can be done. Agonizing will not help nor will it change the fact that something crappy just happened. The best we can do is take a small amount of time to be upset, then move on. Keep truckin’.

13. Get out of town!

In the new year, I plan to use this phrase to express my disbelief at what someone just told me.

“Did you know that most Muppets are left-handed?”
“Get out of town!”

No…I’m kidding. I plan to travel more. I was born and raised in Dalton, GA, and have traveled very little in my 23 years. It may not be in the cards to take a bunch of trips across the country, but I’m setting the goal of taking multiple day trips in the coming months. There’s so much more to see!

14. Be more like my dogs.

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You may be scratching your head at this one, but hear me out. My dogs are the most enthusiastic, loving creatures on the planet. Posy, my Basset/Boxer mix, has never met a stranger. She does not discriminate. If you have hands to pet her, she is your best friend. And don’t even get me started on their zest for life. They get excited about absolutely everything: meal times, lazy couch time, potty time outside, you name it. I can even start talking in a very excited voice to them, and they start wagging their tails and doing that cute little hopping dance that dogs do. It is precious.

So here are my goals-within-the goal, or “Lifestyle Tips from Pepper and Posy”:

  • Be unabashedly enthusiastic about the things that make me happy
  • Play hard, nap hard
  • Welcome new friends with open arms
  • Love unconditionally

15. Laugh, laugh, laugh. (And cry a little.)

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One thing that I’ve found is very therapeutic in times of stress is to find the humor in life. This is where the old saying “laugh to keep from crying” comes into play. But sometimes, it’s okay to cry. They say laughter is the best medicine, but sometimes a good cry can help. Like, an ugly, snotty, toddler cry. As long as it’s not in public, because I think that might freak some people out at Kroger. But one thing I hope to do in 2017 is laugh more than I cry. Because life is short, and laughing makes you feel good. In my book, there’s not much better than when something makes you laugh so hard, it turns into a silent wheeze; you’re doubled over, tears streaming down your face, trying to get a grip. That’s what the world needs more of.

16. Be. Patient. (I mean it.)

When describing myself, I always use the phrase, “I’m a lot.” Meaning, I’m a lot to handle. I have an abundance of many things: personality, love, passion, drive. What I don’t have an abundance of is patience. I’m getting better about letting things settle and breathing, but I have a long ways to go. Perhaps one of the most important goals I’ve set for myself for the new year is that of being patient.

The Information Age has spoiled us all. Now, at our fingertips, we can achieve instant gratification on many fronts: sending a message to someone, posting an angry status in the heat of the moment, one-click shopping, looking up who sang that one song that’s been stuck in your head all day, etc. Some things take time. Some things you have to be patient for. And those things are usually the ones that are worth your while.

17. Lose 20 pounds.

I am so sorry to shift the tone so drastically with the last item of my list. Truth be told, I was extremely nervous to put this on the list and onto the internet for anyone passing by to read. But this is a big deal.

I am unhealthy. My bevy of poor choices in diet and lack of exercise have culminated in weight gain that goes beyond “happy weight,” a term which I hate. My sleep schedule and quality are shoddy. My head is foggy a lot of the time. My stress is through the roof. The time has come for me to take charge of my life, make better choices, and get it in gear. I am doing this for no one other than myself, and have laid it all out here on a public forum to hold myself accountable. This will not be an easy process, as I am used to eating whatever I want, not exercising, and staying up late, but I feel it is crucial to being the best version of myself I can be. Wish me luck!

 

 

 

With all of these goals laid out, I have a big year ahead! The time is now. The need is mighty. Negate the negativity. Live life. Be the ball (wait, I don’t think that one fits here.)

Anyway…I’m both excited and terrified of what 2017 has in store. Each hour brings us closer to toasting the new year, replete with potential and chances to evolve, to move onward and upward. I think most of my fear comes from being scared of not having the willpower to break bad habits, and of reverting back to past behavior. Which reminds me of the last two lines of The Great Gatsby:

…tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther. . . . And one fine morning——

So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.

It’s not easy to move forward without looking back. Our past happened, and there’s nothing we can do about it except learn from what we’ve been through. Even though we are constantly pulled back into our past, we move forward as much as we can.

Here’s to inching forward together. See you in 2017!

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